Image may be NSFW.
Clik here to view.Most anti-rape discussion frames the rape prevention as the victim’s responsibility. We’ve all heard that we’re not supposed to walk alone at night, not drink too much, don’t wear this or that, etc. It’s long been a feminist complaint that rape prevention needs to be taught to the potential perpetrators. Teaching the necessity of consent, and for that matter, what consent is, is an important step in stopping sexual assault. One recent campaign does a great job representing this: Don’t Be That Guy. Canadian organization Battered Women’s Support Services is using these ads to spread their “The Violence Stops Here” message. It makes it clear that “sex without consent = sexual assault”, and even has ads that make it clear men can be rape victims, too.
The campaign conveys the belief that consent is an active thing that must be continually given, not merely the absence of a no. “Enthusiastic consent” is a term many feminists use to describe what proper consent looks like. As in, if you are with a person who says things like “I’m not sure,” is hesitant, disengaged, or seems too inebriated to make their wishes clear, you have not adequately obtained consent and should stop. Once enthusiastic consent becomes the standard for sexual activity, it is no longer possible to dismiss rape of women who were drunk, who didn’t fight back hard enough (by someone’s standards), or any other thing society often uses to dismiss sexual assault. Most importantly, enthusiastic consent places the responsibility on us all to obtain consent, not on our partners to say no enough times or in the right way.
Because sexual assault has been framed for so long in our society as something that the victim is responsible for, it’s going to take more than one campaign to change the standard of consent. But this campaign is an excellent start.